Random quote of the day:

“The artist is the only one who knows that the world is a subjective creation, that there is a choice to be made, a selection of elements.”

—Anaïs Nin, February 1954, The Diary of Anaïs Nin, Vol. 5


Disclaimer: The views expressed in this random quote of the day do not necessarily reflect the views of the poster, her immediate family, Siegfried and Roy, Leonard Maltin, or the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. They do, however, sometimes reflect the views of the Cottingley Fairies.

I dreamed I was watching a real bad Syfy-type movie about the Zombie Apocalypse, a father and young daughter trying to escape overland through a desert landscape of mobile dead people. They had encountered someone earlier in the movie (a scene I “felt” had happened, but didn’t actually witness) who told them about a safe place where some guy named Eric could protect people because he had figured out a foolproof way to fight off the zombies. So they headed that way.

On the road, they came upon a black and tan Studebaker in a ditch by the side of the road. In it was one for reals dead person missing head, shoulders, and chest, and a zombie woman looking well fed. She lumbered out the car door at Dad & Kid so Dad pulled out his flamethrower  (yeah, it just appeared strapped on his back) and prepared to dispatch her to wherever flaming zombies go, but she had this weird power to melt into the ground. She could disappear without disturbing the soil, like a ghost passing through solid objects, and could stick her hand or other body parts up through the ground in a similar manner. Way cool.

So she goes underground and doesn’t come back up and Dad assumes (as people do in badly plotted movies) she’s gone for good and tells Kid to come along, but Kid is fascinated by the ghostly zombie and dawdles (as kids do in badly plotted movies) to see if she’ll come back.

At that moment (a teachable moment?) Dad decides to teach Kid a lesson about disobedience and takes off without her (and I started yelling at the screen, “Oh, come on! He wouldn’t do that in a real life zombie apocalypse!”) But he leaves and doesn’t come back.

As is the way with dreams, I stopped watching the movie and became the Kid. She waited around but Dad never came back. I had this feeling that in other parts of the movie, the ones the other me was watching and not participating in, he was fighting off zombies, including the ghost zombie woman, and desperately trying to get back to/search for his little girl. But I didn’t actually witness these scenes, as I said, just “felt” them happening.

So Kid started back down the road looking for Eric’s house, hoping that’s where Dad is. She eventually gets there (though I didn’t actually witness or participate in that journey), and knocks on the door. No one answers, so she walks in and sees this little kid laying on the floor, his bottom half hidden by a chair. We never see that bottom half, but there’s something creepy going on there—you could just feel it in that don’t-go-downstairs-in-your-nightie! kind of way.

Kid says to Other Kid, “I’m looking for Eric.”

Other Kid (not looking so good) says in a sluggish voice, “He’s here.”

At that moment, a zombie man steps into the room and says, “I’m Eric.”

And then I woke up. But I did feel, upon waking, that Dad in true badly plotted movie fashion, would swoop in for a rescue in the nick of time.

Isn’t that weird? I mean, a black and tan Studebaker!

18 Jan
My new favorite search that got someone to my website: “my father planted a garden.”

18 Jan
With my bad knees I often catch glimpses of myself in windows walking like a zombie. *sigh* At least I don’t hold my arms out and go, “Urrrr.”

25 Jan 
Mom busted out of rehab Tuesday morning, January 22. We’ve been on the lamb since—except for the time spent sleeping in our own beds and loving it.

28 Jan 
A really good day followed by a really bad morning and the necessity of having to leave her alone to come to work. Life doesn’t fuck around.

I know very well she’s fragile, but hearing a medical professional describe her that way makes it more real.

29 Jan 
I do not recommend sleeping in a recliner overnight unless you’re deathly ill and half-unconscious. I got out of the chair, but all day long my body was saying, “No, you didn’t.”

4 Feb  
With Mom in the ER around 4:30 a.m. with breathing difficulties, but we were back home again by 9:30. Probably dialysis related issues. Dialysis this afternoon should take care of it.

6 Feb 
Praise my neighbor! He’s agreed to take Mom to dialysis Mondays and Wednesdays, saving me leaving work midday to drive a 50 mile loop. Hallowed be his name!

7 Feb
Remember that scene from the remake of Invasion of the Body Snatchers where the guy falls asleep next to his dog? http://huff.to/Y8NWsh 

7 Feb
Back in the ER with Mom (more breathing difficulties). And home again four hours later. Consensus: Mom needs oxygen at home. Tomorrow I will check with her primary care doctor about ordering some.

7 Feb
So they delivered the pre-assembled folding wheelchair in a box that looked like it contained a large screen TV. I pushed it up against the small garage door to get it out of the way of the front steps so I could get Mom in the house after dialysis. Between then and when I came back out some a**wipe came along and opened the box to see if it was worth stealing (I guess). Apparently, it wasn’t. The brazenness: only six feet from the front door.

12 Feb

I’ve released a breath I didn’t know I was holding: Mom’s oxygen has arrived.

13 Feb

Prius in front of me: “I am a green car. Are you?” Me: “You are an asshat. Any more questions?”

They’re everywhere here in LA. I always think of that South Park episode and picture the drivers holding wine glasses to their behinds.

13 Feb

I’m smart, but sometimes I haven’t got the sense of an addlepated cow.

13 Feb

9 p.m. and I finally get to sit down for the night. Bed soon. What a party girl.

14 Feb

Children’s author Terry Deary wants to close all libraries (and not ironically): http://bit.ly/12LPQpK  You, sir, are a privileged douche.

I wouldn’t have had any books to read as a child if it wasn’t for libraries. My parents didn’t have the money for them. Besides, libraries also do movies and CD lending, also part of the “entertainment industry” Mr. Deary feels is being negatively impacted by “free books.”